Bloomberg Has a Functioning Time Machine

Bloomberg Has a Functioning Time Machine humor

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One of my life goals is to prove that time travel is possible, and today Bloomberg helped me get one step closer to completing that goal.

There's an interesting footnote to today's Amazon event. I'm sure you know that Amazon launched the Kindle Fire and 3 Kindle ebook readers. The event didn't begin until 10 am but Bloomberg managed to post a complete summary of the presentation (including a play by play) long before anything happened.

Trust me, I was there and the Bloomberg  account was spot on. But here's the interesting part: Bloomberg  posted their story at 9:35 am - long before anyone could have known what was going to happen.

This, folks, is conclusive proof that Bloomberg has a time machine.  How else would you explain it? This isn't the first time it's happened, either. Bloomberg also posted their story on the Kobo Germany launch the day before it actually launched. That tells me that they clearly have used the time machine before.

But it also brings up a couple questions. Why are they using it for such a petty purpose and why are they being so clumsy? If I had a time machine, I would be using it to quietly dominate the various trading markets. I'd also use it to make sure that no bloggers found out about it - hold on a second, there's someone at the doo

About Nate Hoffelder (9908 Articles)
Nate Hoffelder is the founder and editor of The Digital Reader:"I've been into reading ebooks since forever, but I only got my first ereader in July 2007. Everything quickly spiraled out of control from there. Before I started this blog in January 2010 I covered ebooks, ebook readers, and digital publishing for about 2 years as a part of MobileRead Forums. It's a great community, and being a member is a joy. But I thought I could make something out of how I covered the news for MobileRead, so I started this blog."

5 Comments on Bloomberg Has a Functioning Time Machine

  1. Ah, that explains a lot. Yesterday I was suprised to hear a short piece in our local radio here in northern Germany pointing out the new devices in detail at a time I knew the event had not started yet. So they got it from there too.

  2. “If I had a time machine, I would be using it to quietly dominate the various trading markets.” I would do this too, but I would occasionally deliberately lose money from time to time to avoid suspicion of my advance knowledge. Who knows, maybe the future financial police might be watching.

  3. Time machine aside, the rest of the article should required reading for everybody ij the publishing industry whining about Amazon.
    The title alone speaks volumes about what the company is.
    Omnivores are few and far between but they’re usually at the top of the food chain. 😉

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